So Many to Choose From! How to Find the Right Counsellor for You

Deciding to see a counsellor can be a big step and finding the right one may feel daunting. With so many options, different therapy styles, and numerous professional titles, it’s easy to get stuck overthinking it. Ultimately, the most important thing is to find someone you feel comfortable talking to. Here’s a simple guide to help you figure out what counselling is right for you.

What do I want from therapy?

Before diving into your search, take a moment to think about what’s bringing you to counselling. Some common reasons people seek counselling include:

• Anxiety or stress

• Relationship issues

• Life transitions - think having a baby, getting divorced, changing jobs

• Grief and loss

• Lack of self-esteem

• Anger

  
  

It might just be a feeling that you can't cope or something that keeps playing on your mind. Just having a rough idea of what’s going on can help you find a counsellor who can help you with what you're facing.

What type of therapist do I need?

Not all mental health professionals provide the same services. Here’s a quick breakdown:

• Counsellors: They focus on emotional support and life challenges.

• Psychotherapists: They delve deeper into psychological issues and patterns. There can be a lot of crossover between this and counselling.

• Clinical Psychologists: They assess and treat mental health disorders.

• Psychiatrists: They are medical doctors who can prescribe medication.

  
  

If you’re looking for someone to talk to about emotions, life challenges, and ways to move forward, a counsellor or psychotherapist is likely what you need.

How do I know if a therapist is professionally trained?

Believe it or not, in the UK, counselling isn’t legally regulated. However, most qualified counsellors will have undergone training endorsed by a professional body and are registered with them.

Professional bodies to look out for include the NCPS (National Counselling & Psychotherapy Society) - who I am registered with - and the BACP (British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy). Being a member of a professional body means a counsellor is committed to ethical standards and meets training requirements.

What type of therapy approach is a ‘good’ one?

Counsellors use various theories and approaches to counselling, and there are many to choose from! Here are just a few common approaches:

• Person-Centred Counselling: here, you'll be supported to feel comfortable to talk about whatever you need to, without feeling judged. Most therapists will be 'person-centred' alongside other techniques.

• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): this tends to be what's offered on the NHS (the National Health Service in the UK). You'll work on challenging your thought patterns.

• Gestalt Counselling: here you'll look at what's happening for you in the present moment to bring more awareness to who you are. You might take part in experiments to further build awareness.

• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: here you'll work on accepting what's happening to you in any given moment, to help you feel more in control and able to build the life you desire.

• Integrative Counselling: here your counsellor will bring in different theories and approaches to whatever best suits what's going on for you. I am a trained integrative counsellor.

  
  

Each approach has its strengths. I find that integrative counselling means I can reach for the right approach or technique to help a client with what they're facing. I sometimes bring in mindfulness or existential thinking too, if it's relevant. Researching some of these theories may help you decide which might resonate with you.

How will I know if a counsellor is right for me?

The connection you have with your counsellor is one of the most important factors in how effective therapy will be. Ask yourself:

• Do I feel comfortable sharing my thoughts and feelings?

• Does the therapist listen without judgment?

• Am I able to express my concerns openly?

  
  

Many counsellors offer a short introductory chat. This is your chance to see if they feel like a good fit. If something doesn’t feel right, it’s perfectly okay to try someone else. Therapists are accustomed to this, so don’t worry about any awkwardness! I offer a free 20 minute chat to start with for all new clients.

The practicalities

A few practical but essential things to check include:

• Location: Is the therapist’s office convenient for you?

• Availability: Do their hours align with your schedule?

• Fees: Are their rates within your budget?

• Accessibility: if you've any accessibility needs, can they be supported?

How to know if it’s the right counsellor for me?

You might not find the ‘perfect’ counsellor straight away and that’s completely normal. Therapy is a process, and it can take a few sessions to feel comfortable and ready to share your inner world.

If you’re unsure about something or feel judged in any way, tell your counsellor as this might actually help for you to get what you need. Feedback can be an important part of the therapeutic process.

Finally, trust your instincts

Choosing a counsellor doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Focus on what you need, find someone qualified who feels like a good fit, and trust your instincts. Therapy can be life-changing, and the right counsellor will make all the difference.

If you’re considering counselling and aren’t sure where to start, I offer a free 20-minute chat, no pressure, just a chance to see if it feels like the right fit. I work in person from Abbotskerswell and Newton Abbot as well as online. You can contact me at suzehowellcounselling@gmail.com or on 07467 734077 to set up a time that works for you.